The Frozen Time of Gaza: A Year of Loss,Retrocausality,and the Erosion of Future Hope
(Please note: This article addresses deeply sensitive and traumatic events. Reader discretion is advised.)
The calendar turns, promising a new year, fresh starts, and renewed hope. But in Gaza, the turning of the page feels less like progress and more like a cruel repetition. 2023 wasn’t a year lived; it was a year endured, a descent into a reality where the past, present, and future collapse into a single, agonizing moment. As a resident of Gaza, and a content writer whose life has been irrevocably shattered by the ongoing conflict, I offer this account not as a journalist reporting on tragedy, but as someone living within it, witnessing the systematic dismantling of a life, a community, and a future.
This isn’t simply a story of loss; it’s a testament to the resilience - and the breaking point - of a people facing a uniquely protracted and brutal crisis.It’s a story of how trauma reshapes perception, even bending our understanding of time itself. My experience,and the experiences of countless others,demand a deeper examination of the conditions in Gaza,the failures of international response,and the psychological toll of living under constant threat.
The Unkept Truce and the Quite Genocide
The initial truce offered a fragile respite, a sliver of hope quickly extinguished.Deep down, a chilling premonition lingered – a knowing that Israel would not honor its commitments.That suspicion proved tragically accurate. The intense, overt bombardment didn’t cease entirely, but morphed into a quieter, insidious form of violence. This wasn’t peace; it was a recalibration of destruction.
Together, the relentless expansion of the “yellow line” - the demarcation of land seized by Israel – continued to erode what little remained of our neighborhoods. This land grab, conducted with impunity, underscored a stark reality: the conflict wasn’t about security; it was about displacement and control. The world’s response,or rather lack of response,was perhaps the most devastating blow. Governments, rather of condemning the ceasefire violations, rewarded israel with lucrative deals, most notably a $35 billion gas agreement. This blatant disregard for Palestinian lives and international law sent a clear message: our suffering is inconsequential.
Winter’s Cruelty and the GHF Site: Witnessing the Abyss
The onset of winter brought a new layer of suffering. Flooding tents, collapsing structures, and the heartbreaking deaths of infants from hypothermia became commonplace. But even these tangible horrors pale in comparison to the psychological scars inflicted by witnessing the sheer scale of devastation.
My visit to the GHF (presumably a site for displaced persons) remains etched in my memory as the most profoundly disturbing experience of my life. I hesitate to describe the scenes I witnessed, fearing words will fail to convey the depth of the evil I encountered. The fear I felt there hasn’t dissipated; it lingers with me, triggered by familiar landmarks on my daily journeys. It’s a constant reminder of the fragility of life and the omnipresent threat of violence.
The Paradox of Time in Gaza
Now, as I navigate the rain-soaked alleys of my tent camp, a basic question haunts me: what sustains people in the face of such overwhelming loss? It’s not hope, not in the customary sense.It’s a complex blend of helplessness, a weary surrender to fate, and a strange, unsettling sense of temporal distortion.
In Gaza, time doesn’t flow linearly.It doesn’t move forward like an arrow. It’s a circle, a loop where the past, present, and future are inextricably intertwined. This isn’t merely a philosophical observation; it’s a lived experience. The trauma is so pervasive that it collapses the boundaries of time, making it unfeasible to escape the cycle of violence.
This phenomenon led me to contemplate the concept of retrocausality - the idea that the future can influence the past. Watching buildings crumble, I find myself imagining the Israeli planes that will bomb them in the future, as if the destruction is already predetermined and we are merely witnessing its unfolding.
Of course, the logical clarification is that these buildings are collapsing due to prior damage. But the cycle of destruction and rebuilding is relentless. Israel consistently targets structures that Palestinians painstakingly reconstruct. This constant repetition creates a sense of inevitability,a feeling that the rubble we see today is already destined for destruction tomorrow. It’s not a leap to imagine that the future violence
